honor where honor is due {mothers day dichotomy}

Mothers Day is supposed to be filled with love notes, flowers, and chocolates.
Mothers, nationwide, take a break from cooking and cleaning, even receiving breakfast in bed, a meal out, and "coupons" from Dads and kids to cash in at a later time for chores.
As all mothers, I suppose, I was looking forward to these perks.
After all, I waited many years to celebrate this day.
Year after childless year, Mothers day mornings often found me standing in front of the mirror, with grief-filled tears running down my face, willing myself to be strong and go to church anyway.  It's been three years now since we brought our babes home, and those nine years of waiting seem like a world away.
Mothers Day is a day to be thankful, celebrating the miraculous joy of life and family.

This year, we attended church with my mother-in-love and my husband surprised her by being one of the several people to publicly affirm and praise their mamas.  It was wonderful. There were many joyous tears.

but then, things took a turn in my heart...

The pastor (he was a groomsman in our wedding, so these words are absolutely no criticism of this stellar man of God whom we call friend - just to make that clear!) - in his sharing about mothers, he made reference to the women of the Bible who exemplified selflessness and sacrifice by "giving up" their sons to the purposes of the Lord.  Hannah brought Samuel to the temple where he was then raised by the priest Eli.  The mother of Moses, to save his life from the Egyptians who sought to kill all baby boys, placed her son in a basket made of reeds into the river, where he was found by the Princess of Egypt and then raised in the palace.

Hannah.  Moses' mother.  The pain of their sacrifice.  Oh Jesus.  My heart.

the rest of the service is foggy.  my mind became consumed with one thought...

photo credit of Ethiopian woman and baby: peasblog

All I could think about was "her."  The woman who gave birth to my children.  Where is she?  Is she hungry?  What circumstances led her to "give up" her child?  Is she even alive?  If only I could know.  If only I could thank her.  Give her a hug.  Make sure she knows what an incredible little person she carried in her womb and gave birth to.  Cry with her.  Give her the honor that is being poured out today.

On this day, we honor mothers of all ages for working hard, for not giving up, for pouring out agape love, for being the ultimate encouragers, and for bringing tough love when needed.  We honor single mothers.  We honor soon-to-be mamas and hope-to-be mamas.  But, sitting in the service this day, everything within me wanted to stand up and shout with voice cracking and tears streaming, "Don't forget about HER!  My babies would not even be here without HER!  We must honor HER too!  Wherever she is."

I restrained myself... but still, I want to honor her.  But how?

The best I can do is honor her in my words to E-man and Baby Doll.  I will say, in varying depths as they're old enough to understand, "Your first mama must have been such a wonderful, strong, resilient, beautiful, talented, intelligent woman.  Because I see those qualities in you.  She must have loved you very much."  That's how I will honor her.  I will esteem her and speak well of her country.  I will give honor where honor is due.

Mothers Day is not what I dreamed it would be.
But it's the way it should be.

announcement! we are Paper Pregnant!

I've given y'all a few teasers and now it's official.

We are "Paper Pregnant" and on our way to becoming the N-Five.

We are officially accepted into the Ethiopian Adoption program,

again with YWAM/CHI.

We are currently working on updating our homestudy and collecting the mountain of documents for our dossier (documents that go to the Ethiopian government).

We will be traveling to Ethiopia twice this time - once for a court hearing before an Ethiopian judge and then again (a few months later) for a US Embassy appointment.  On the first trip, we will meet our child and on the second trip, we will bring our child home with us forever.  In between appointments, I might go a little crazy.

We would appreciate all of your prayers.

International adoption is quite the roller coaster...

but oh so worth it!

p.s. the above picture is on Easter morning.  Aren't they darling?

mug shot with a purpose

hee hee

Kings and Queens

Loving this song and video right now.

"These could be our daughters and our sons."
"Every child has a dream to belong and be loved."
"Then they will be brave and free.  Shout Your Name in victory!"
"Boys become kings.  Girls will be queens.  Wrapped in Your majesty."


It's time.

February and March Snapshots

Amidst the craziness of moving, I did manage to get a few pictures of my two precious ones.

We've continued to do school, albeit a bit more sporadic.

Here's proof that we DID do some school during this hectic couple of months.

In February, even with all the hubub, we made it a priority to drive 90min north to join our adoption agency in welcoming some Ethiopian Government dignitaries during their US tour.  It was a privilege to meet them and introduce them to our "thriving" children.  Those smiles speak more than words.

Our new pad includes our very own private park, right out the back door.

We are blessed.  Kids are happy.  Mommy's happy.  They need to run.  A lot.

See what I mean?  Running.  First day utilizing "our" park.

E-man had his very first ever school picture taken.

He is so handsome.  Even when much-over-due for a hair cut.

Did I mention it's been crazy?  

Hair cuts (his and mine) kept getting pushed down the priority list.

And this is Spring in the Northwest.

On March 22nd, we woke up to 4 inches of snow!

The kids have built in playmates/babysitters who live upstairs.

They had a blast that morning, even without their snowboots (forsaken in the abyss of a storage unit.)

Snowman love.

And two weeks later, we were up to seventy degrees for Easter weekend!

Hard to believe these pics were taken in the same month.

Our community Easter egg hunt at a local park is more like an Easter egg race.

It's a mad dash for eggs scattered across the field that is over in about 60 seconds.

No joke.

They still had a blast, though.

Even if Mommy did fail to get them a container of any kind; they just filled up their pockets.

Photo-ops with Speedway Raccoon, Fred Meyer Bear, Easter bunny, and Police Department Pooch.

Baby Doll didn't like the raccoon, but she walked right up to all the others and bravely asked,

"can I take a picture wif you?"

... and I'll save the pictures of Easter Sunday for another post.

teaching blasphemy (?)

While listening to my Darlin' read and expound on the Easter story of our Lord, my eyebrows went up a little when he started in on Jesus going down into Hell for 3 days to defeat death and Satan.

Later that night:

me: Darlin' I think that part about Jesus going to Hades was a a bit over their heads.  It might confuse them to go into so much detail at this age.

him: I think it's okay.  It's not going to hurt them.

me: okay, well, it might provide us some comic relief later.

Overheard a few days later:

Baby Doll "reading" her Bible:

... and THEN Jesus went to HELL and His SINS were forgiven!

This might be teaching them blasphemy.  I'm not sure.

My Easter Beauty {subtitle: we're back}

When the lighting is just right and my "subject" is still, 

every once in a while I get an amazing shot by accident on my non-dslr camera.

Here, my Baby Doll was standing close to me right after our family Easter egg hunt.

She was looking down at the haul in her Easter basket.

I had my camera ready and - WOW - I got a winner.

No editing needed.

I love this beautiful, spunky, humorous, full-of-life little 3 1/2 year old so very much.

Thank you Jesus.

In other news:

Our house sold and closed in mid-February.  

We're living in a temporary rental situation - that we love - while looking for the "perfect" home to buy.  There are other exciting adventures in the hopper for us too.  

... to be continued

December Snapshot Collage

In the midst of boxes and escrow papers, we had a sweet simple Christmas.

We did pull out our slim fake tree in its cute lil' pot.  Most of the ornaments were made by the kids this year or by me when I was a kid, from a box my Mom handed me when she found out I wasn't planning to decorate the tree.  I also set up the nativity and put together an advent countdown for the kids,

and.that.was.it.  

Simple yet meaningful.

Here's a Christmas Collage for y'all:

top row: nativity by candlelight when the power went out, a Christmas craft with gobs of glitter glue, and my first try at the Pioneer.Woman's cinnamon rolls (yum!)

2nd row: the babes all dressed up for Christmas Eve with Grandma and Grandpa

3rd row: in their new pj's at the grandparents, Baby Doll's new kitchen from Ayat & Ayate, and Baby Doll playing Wii Bowiling with Uncle J (no idea why she's blowing up her cheeks!)

last row: motorized car from Uncle J, Baby Doll "sleeping" with Diesel dog, and me with my Baby Doll

Our house should close the beginning of January... we hope.

We're looking for a place to rent while we continue the search for the "perfect" home to buy.

The kids are doing great and don't seem to mind (too much) that I'm boxing up most of their stuff.

They continue to make their requests known:

a fireplace (go figure)

and a fence (so, they say, we can get a dog)... we'll see about that one.

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

E-man wants to make sure you notice his a.ngry b.irds slippers and Baby Doll's H.ello K.itty slippers.

This picture is blurry but I like it.

The joy on their faces is apparent.

And it's rather appropriate for our "blurry" life right now.

Happy New Year from the N-4!

November Snapshot is...

... not happening.

My mother teasingly reminded me that I haven't done a November Snapshots post.

November seems like such a long time ago.

Browsing through my pictures, I remember now...

we had so much fun in November.

We donned heavy coats for the first time and jumped in leaves.

Baby Doll turned three and had her first "friend" party.

We had a fabulous Thanksgiving - twice.

aaaaaaaand

we put our house up for sale and sold it in less than 30 days.

We will be moving a few days after Christmas. 

Destination to be determined.

We're also car hunting because my darlin' got rear-ended and totalled his little red jet'.

(He's okay though and we are sooooo thankful for that.)

See y'all back here after the dust settles... hopefully in a newly purchased home.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all of you!

October Snapshots

Another month with the N-4.

In pictures.

We enjoyed our indian summer into October.
Eventually the inevitable rains and indoor activities began.
Now we start setting our sights on snow.

E-man likes to turn off all the lights in the house and play with his light up remote control car.

Thank you Grandma and Grandpa for the cool birthday present!

We had a visitor: Joy Casey of YWAM Ethiopia.

She came to hear us practice our testimony for the Miracles are Real banquet.

Practice time took about 10 minutes, then we just enjoyed her company.
We don't have any pics of the actual banquet but it was really great!  It was such an honor to share our adoption testimony to a group of nearly 400 people.

Homeschool is going great!
E-man is reading! and memorizing up a storm.
And Baby Doll is right by our side learning a lot too...

except for when she's photographing her animals,

or feeding them lunch...  apparently they were still waiting for the rest of the guests to arrive.


We went to the pumpkin patch with a group of moms & kids

 and nearly "lost" the number one son to the patch.

photo credit for this shot: my friend, Jen Bryan

E-man and I went on a school field trip to the King Tut exhibit,

but no pictures; they're not allowed.

A 5 year old has a very limited concept of time and place,
so the content was waaaaay over E-man's head.

Our conversations went something like this:

E: where's King Tut?

me: well, he's dead.

E: [blank stare]

me: we're just seeing all the cool stuff that was found in his tomb!

E: what's a tomb?

me: It's where they put his... Don't touch that!  It's reallllllly old and reaaaaaaly expensive.

E: okay Mom... is it almost lunchtime?

His highlight from the exhibit was seeing the ancient stone toilet seat
- he wanted to know, "how do they flush it?"
His highlight from the whole trip was hot cocoa at S.tarbucks.

We took advantage of a day off (our ONE day off all month) from the rain.

We attended a Trunk or Treat party without the trunks (due to rain) on Oct 27.

Here's the cutest little S.uperman and Princess I ever saw.

While everyone else was getting free candy door-to-door, we celebrated Daddy's Oct 31 birthday and Baby Doll's Nov 1 birthday at C.laim.jumper.  Yep.  We're one of THOSE families that leaves our house dark and empty on Oct 31 (whether we're home or not).  Daddy's birthday trumps all other activities.  

What's left of her red velvet cupcake.  I forgot to take a picture of Daddy.  Oops.

In other news,
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I won this book on a blog giveway from Team Alexander.  Thanks Emily!  And I read it in two days.  You should read it too.  

No Greater Love by Levi Benkert
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

No Greater Love was a great initial memoir of a family's first couple of years in Ethiopia. Levi Benkert writes an honest and poignant account of his involvement with orphan care in rural southern Ethiopia. He shares his joys and disappointments. It was a quick read but that did not take away from the impact of the story. I look forward to a follow up memoir as I am sure this family will continue to do great things for the Lord in the beautiful land of Ethiopia (birth place of my 2 children.)

View all my reviews

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Oh!  And we put our house up for sale.

Just a small thing.  No big deal.

We asked the kids how they feel about us moving.

Baby Doll said: I want to move to a new house.  I want one with a fireplace.

E-man said: I feel good.  I want a fenced yard so we can get a L.eonberger.

We're taking these requests into consideration and trusting the Lord to plant us in the neighborhood he has planned for us.  I never realized how much work it is to sell your house, but we're excited!

In the meantime, I better get back to cleaning.  Again.  And again.

Coming up in "Thankful Month" November: Baby Doll's third birthday party, Mommy gets a girls' day away with my BFFs, and of course - Thanksgiving with the family.  There's nothing like family!  Hopefully we'll get some dry days to jump in some leaves, too.

I'm going to try to post more than once a month... but I'm not sure what to write about.
Any suggestions?